Happy Birthday Erica!!! I love you so much.

I hope you realize what an amazing person you are. Your love to work with kids and to serve every sunday in kids connection is so awesome. And your love for people in general. I love you girl. You are truly beautiful inside and out.

So it's my crazy Pastor's birthday today. I've known Pastor Darin for about 6 years now. He's my pastor, friend, and he has always been like a dad to me. His love for other people is obvious, and his heart for those who don't know God is his life's mission. :-) Thank you Pastor Darin for the amazing person you are and for helping me through so many things. I value our conversations. I love you and I hope your birthday was great!

So maybe I'm writing because I'm once again avoiding the final touches of cleaning my room, and going to switch the laundry downstairs. Or maybe it's because I can say what I'm feeling here when you can't say what you want to out loud.

Today I'm wondering if loving someone ever goes away. Time heals things I suppose. But how much time? When does it come to an end? I suppose not till heaven :-) Praise God that there is no heartache or pain in heaven. But when does everything stop reminding you of someone? When do you stop wishing that things could have turned out differently? When do you stop blasting the same songs over and over and singing at the top of your lungs because you feel that the writers of the lyrics are the only ones who understand perfectly how you feel?



Someone wise once told me that you can't change everything and especially the past, so you just focus on what you have now. So right now, I'm trying to become better. Someone who is more honest. Someone who doesn't always hide how she's feeling. Someone who pours her heart out into music. I'm also someone hoping for a man to come along who wants the job of sweeping me off my feet. Wanting to love me and one who I can be honest with and where he can be honest with me too.

But I've learned you have to be very careful who you give your heart to, because sometimes you don't mean to and it happens. You especially have to be careful because sometimes you don't always get all the pieces back.

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart"